"if you want my body and you think i'm sexy..."

I saw Rod Stewart perform on Wednesday and nearly ate my words for calling him a chump. I was talking to Ken before leaving and he chuckled at the fact I had to see Rod. Rod. Yeah. So on the way I was telling my mom how they changed the First Union Center to Wachovia Center, thus changing the name from the FU Center to the Wack Off Center. Then I laughed because I was seeing Rod at the Wack Off Center. Funny.

We get there and I am the youngest one around. People are amusing. Every guy was in tow of a woman or was gay. Seriously. There was a couple behind me while waiting to get inside...
woman: look happy, we're going to have fun tonight!
man: do you think they will showing the game tonight on one of the tv screens?

I think that man shared the same sentiment as the rest of the hetero male population at the Wack Off Center. It was kinda cute to see everyone so excited about the show, I guess I have gotten so jaded because of the amazing talent I see at initimate shows. And I hope I never grow tired of that.

My mom and I grab our seats and they were super close to the stage, which was great. So many women brought flowers, I thought I was going to puke. I saw some woman leave from the side of the stage and I pointed her out to my mom and said "there wen't Rod's floozy". I didn't expect her to retort with "she probably just gave him a blow job". I nearly fell out of my chair because I don't think I have ever heard her say that before.

Every guy in audience looked miserable, and then I become enlightened realizing that Rod has probably gotten more ass than all of the men in the crowd combined. I verbalized this, apparently a little too loudly, and everyone around me concurred and laughed.

Rod takes the stage with my favorite Rod song, Forever Young. He looked like a rocker and exploded on stage. I was completely taken aback. Man, granted, I think of him more as a performer than a musician, and I was impressed. His band was great. The bassist is from Philly and I think the lead guitarist is his son. After his seventh song he turned around and adjusted himself. I saw it.

Rod sure was energetic for nearing 60 and the ladies swooned. One thing that stuck out was how into himself Rod is. His name is plastered everywhere and every screen behind him had old 80's pictures of himself during his performance. Very amusing. What a shmooze.

He took a break and came back with the Philadelphia Orchestra and a tux and played that American Songbook crap. Shmmoooooooze.

At 11:30 pm it was done and all went home. The Rod Stewart thong was $15 so I didn't purchase it.