"I'm spinning round the room in awe" ryan adams

Saturday, November 08, 2003

back when he was underground in a gritty bar

I find solace in the perfectly crafted cup of peppermint tea, and realize that its one thing thats tangible and makes absolute sense right now.

While Michelle was in college, we were best friends and nearly inseperable. She graduated a year before me and unfortunately time and space has taken a toll on our friendship, but that unwritten law of loyalty remains and we always pick up where we left off, which is never far from the path from which it originates. After the Michael W. Smith show, I headed up to Iron Hill to meet up with her and Tim. I think that even years from now, apparently the magic number is 30 - the age I will be when I finally give Tim his CDs, we'll find each other still lost within our direction and still looking for guidance and humor in one another. There will always be beer, asses to check out, and critiques on other peoples' clothing.

It's comforting to know that someone else, specifically Michelle, has been sharing the feelings of despair and exhaustion and confusion that I have been going through. We've always said that thing shave worked out for us, for the better, and without any effort. And granted we like the be challenged and thrive on competition and being the best that we can be in whatever we do, but its frustrating when you do not know where your efforts are being recieved and you just can't try anymore. And you wonder if its even worth it.

Friday, November 07, 2003

"say that you'll be the queen of heartbreak avenue"

It was raining in New York City on a Monday, and I walked around barefoot. There was a girl on the corner of Sixth Ave huddled in her blanket crying and shaking. I was watching her from across the street waiting for the light to go from don't walk to walk wondering what was going through her mind. We all have feelings were we just want to break down no matter where or who in front of, and what possibily could have happened in her life that effected her so much at that moment. As I am crossing the street, the first person that walked past her kneeled down, held her, and asked her why. It was saddening to think that that occurence probably wouldn't have happened in Newark, but I witnessed such beauty in the largest and busiest city in America.

insert angry smiley face here

I should be a lot more honest in these blogs, but I have no idea who reads them and you know, I don't divulge that much personal stuff. So there you go. I am a wuss.

Eleven Oh One

I really should blog more often, but I don't. So deal.

The Saturday after the Loop was Aurora's Birthday Bash. Still not 21, but at least she isn't a teenager anymore ;-). I opened up the record store, then headed out in the afternoon to get the girl and head to Lums Pond. It was such a beautifully nice day that we took the top off and blasted our bands top notch on 896. Marlon Spike was playing a benefit at the park so we stopped by for a few songs. Was it bad that we drank and Aurora wanted to smoke at a Health Fair? When we first got there, Aurora saw this booth that said "Treasure Your Sexuality", though she thought it said "Measure Your Sexuality" and she got excited. Afterwards we visited Melissa, who called in the morning to tell us she was on crutches due to her drunken fall at the loop. Then back to my place for some pre-party festivities. We panicked because we couldn't find anything that came in with a clear broadcast of the football game (UD vs. Maine), but were relieved when we heard the Blue Hens still remain undefeated. Man, we rock.

Jen picked us up at my place to head to Tylers. Not without making a scene in front of Rainbow though, I swear I don't think the girl has any front tires left. ;-) The entire trip to Tylers was spent singing loudly to bad radio songs and me on the phone with Mark and Steve trying to give them directions to the Logan House. I enjoyed how Steve called me every 5 minutes to tell me what exit he's at. And he trusts me with directions after I missed 3 exits to his place last time? Just kidding ;-). There are two things I am not good at...things that pertain to the stove, and the road. In regards to everything else, I am a supergenius.
So we hit up the Logan House in full force, early though so we could play the backdoor trick so Aurora could get in. So we all catch up and talk music junk and drink and its fun. Steve played a good solo set in front of a pretty responsive crowd, so that was encouraging. Chris came shortly before the end of Steve's set, and we played the introduction game. Boyce's Road put on a good energetic show. Jen bought the cd, haven't listened to it yet. Caught some of Jonasay's show before Chris and I headed out to Aurora's...
Aurora and I were tlaking about how crazy it would be because its the meeting of several forces...tv people, home people, music people, ud people, random people, yeah. But a good time was had by all. I think the flip cup game at the end was the highlight. I don't drink beer, and I certainly don't drink beer that fast, but I did. Ugh. Chris was playing with the Captain and Steve with water. We had a mixed team. The guy who we were playing didn't want to stop playing - ever. 4:30 AM, Justin left for DC, Steve for Pennsauken, Eric went roaming around the state of DE, Chris and I to Rainbow, and Aurora was left obliterated at her place. A perfect sign of a good birthday.
And of course I had to open the store in the morning. Silly Sundays...

well you know...we all want to change the world

The White Album is playing in the store now -- as is the new Wheat, the Lost Highway Compilation, and the new Ryan Adams -- and Revolution is playing. This song now reminds me of New Years Eve last year at the House of Blues in Myrtle Beach. And I smile.

Spooky Looptasticness!!

I am stealing Jen's blog, then adding my own thoughts because its a lot easier to cut and paste someone's thoughts that were a lot fresher when they wrote it, then trying to recall...
Jens blog can be found here in its completeness: www.livejournal.com/users/sheilahmcpaste

The Halloween bar loop in Wilmington!
Featuring:
LAURIE as The Butterfly
KAREN as Can-can girl
MIRANDA as The Scandalous Winged Woodland Creature
MELISSA as Greek Goddess
NATE as Hula girl
and
JEN as The Spooky Spider Lady

We hit two bars around Logan House, one was full of people twenty years older than us and the other had Melissa and Miranda and I pinned to the ledge the whole time. On the way to bar #2 we were talking about the 48 year old lady who had the same wings as Laurie, and how bitchy she was being, saying "My mask is better, you're not authentic, I've been here longer" and how she should have said in reply "Yeah you've been here twenty years longer". Then we look up to see Miranda and Melissa running down the street, Miranda trying to lift her ass onto a covered motorcycle on the sidewalk, the alarm going off, and the two of them running down the rest of the street. Fabulous :)
Logan House had an hour wait, so we decided to pile in Nate's car and head for the Waterfront. First though, Melissa had to pee, so her and Miranda ran up the steep hill by the parking lot to do their duty. Next thing I know Melissa's trying to walk down and ends up rolling down the hill at top speed onto my feet. Classic. Turns out our poor buddy was pretty hurt when the buzz wore off, and is on crutches. Hang in there Aphrodite!
Kahunaville was fun, Miranda wiping out on the sidewalk in front and exposing all was even more fun. Next was Iron Hill, where I violated Melissa and Karen and I spent some quality time in the bathroom. My Halloween buddies say that I'm a good drunk :-D
Good drunk or not, the "Vamprie Shot" that Miranda and I finished with completely did me in, and I'm completely gone still. Fantastic!
Word of the night: SCANDALOUS

Yeah, that pretty much sums that night up. Except that I don't think I was running as much as Jen said I was. And I don't know why I tried to get on the motorcycle...it was there and it wanted a rider. As soon as I tried getting on it (the operative word there is "tried") a pansy ass alarm went off. Woo Woo Woo!! Pansy enough to make us high tail it to Scratch McGoos though.
Also, I will explain Melissa's injury further. Melissa had to go to the bathroom so I told her to go in the woods instead of waiting in line somewhere else, and I told her I would go up the treacherous hill with her if she needed. So we go up the mountian, in privacy, since where she was standing there was no privacy. We're up the hill and the next thing I know, I see this little white and gold toga careening down the hill and stopping abruptly in front of the car. Man, that was the funniest thing that night. Poor Melissa!!! So we pile in Nate's car and go to Kahuna. Melissa does the Percolater (its a bad bad bad dance from the middle school era) quite well for being an itty bitty white girl. I honestly think that's how she sprained her ankle, not falling down a hill. After Kahuna we walked to Iron Hill, where I proceded to walk just fine. I don't know how I busted ass, but the next thing I know I am on the ground, and it was so funny because I didn't trip or anything, it was a perfetly flat surface. And on the way back up, the crew saw a lot more than I intended. Sorry guys.
At Iron Hill Jen and I did this shot, which not a smart idea. Vampire Shot from Hell it should have been called. Plastered at this point, so there is no where else to go but the diner.
Enough to go home, sleep a few, then work the record store....

Monday, November 03, 2003

yet another test

DisorderRating
Paranoid:Moderate
Schizoid:Low
Schizotypal:High
Antisocial:Low
Borderline:Moderate
Histrionic:Moderate
Narcissistic:Moderate
Avoidant:Moderate
Dependent:Low
Obsessive-Compulsive:High

-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --